Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

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Why cant Michael Jackson take flying lessons? Because he overdosed on pain killers, and is now dead.

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What do you call a black man with scissors.? A Barber.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because-- ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????? ??????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????

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Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

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"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

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how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

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Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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what has two legs and bleeds? half a dog

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Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

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i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

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What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

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Women's rights.

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Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

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Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

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Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

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What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

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Why was johny late to school? He died

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What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

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What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops