Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

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why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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What's the difference between a white person and a black person? The presence of melanin in their skin, as well as often their socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You have AIDS, I'm very sorry

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Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

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KEVIN HART

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Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What goes gurgle, gurgle, gurgle, POP! A baby in a microwave.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

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The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

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A boy walks into a haunted cematery. Zombies eat him.

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What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

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Pickles

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Jacob Black and Edward Cullen show up at your house. You tell your best girl friend and she has you admitted to a psych ward because everyone knows they are fictional characters!

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The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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