What's worse than a dead man?  2 dead men

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

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roses are red violets are blue last time I saw u were in a zoo don't worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at u

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Why did the sponge go to the store? The same reason all sponges go to stores: to be sold to patrons of said store.

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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What happens when you put a bunch of Republicans in a room together? They form a caucus.

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If u and I jumped off a cliff..who would land first? who cares..

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why did the mexican cross the road? to catch its bus on the other side

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have herpes. If I were you I would get tested.

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What's wrong with four black people in a cadillac driving off a cliff? The Cadillac holds 5

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Chuck Norris can drive a car using just his hands and feet!

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I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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whats the boys name that has no legs no arms and no eyes? lucky

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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Why did the baby cross the road? His parents were drug addicts, and didn't pay him any attention.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all walked into a bar. But, the bartender was not happy, as he had noticed that each of them were wearing tops with rude slogans on them. The Bartender said to the Englishman, "you do know that your t-shirt isn't suitable for the children in here, don't you?" "Oh," said the Englishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home to change it at once." Next, came the Irishman, who's top was slightly worse than the Englishman's. The bartender said to the Irishman, "you do know that the joke on your jumper is sexist, don't you?" "Oh," said the Irishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home and change it at once." Last, was the Scotsman. The Scotsman's top was particularly bad, and the bartender especially did not want this top to be seen in his bar. So, the bartender said to the Scotsman, "you do know that the slogan on your cardigan is racist, don't you?" "Oh," said the scotsman, "I'll go home and change it at once."

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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What starts with P and ends in O-R-N? Popcorn.

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What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, D1ck in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from sky-scraper Q:he dies

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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