What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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What do people do in France when they are hungry? Get something to eat.

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Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

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Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

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Microsoft Windows

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing..

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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An Asian oceanographer went scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean. Three days later the coast guard found his remains torn apart by sharks.

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How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

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World Peace

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Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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