What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

What do you call a Mexican man in prison? A prison officer.

A man walks into a bar.

Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

This is a humorous joke, you will laugh.

Two black guys are in an elevator, one guy gets off at the sixth floor, and the other on the eighth. And thats it.

A man is walking down the street when, on the other side, he see's another man, with what appears to be an orange for a head. Unable to contain his curiosity, he approaches and enquires: "Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you have you have an orange for a head..." "That's right" says the man with an orange for a head. "I met a magical genie one day who granted me three wishes..." "Amazing" says the first man, "Please continue". "Well, for my first wish, I wished I was incredibly rich, and that every day, I woke up in a four-poster bed full of used bank notes, and a statement with twenty zeros". "Did that happen?" askes the first man. "It did indeed", replies the man with an orange for a head. "I'm probably the richest man in the world". "Amazing!" replies the first man. "What did you wish for next?" "For my second wish, I wished to be incredibly attractive to women, and that every day, in my four poster bed full of money, when I awoke, there would be three of the most beautiful, naked women imaginable." "Wow! Did THAT happen?" "Of course! To be honest though, that gets a bit of a bind - walking around is a bit difficult these days, in fact, I'm on my way to pick up some cream." "No way, that's amazing!" says the first man. "What was your third wish?" "Well..." replies the man with an orange for a head, "For my third wish, I wished I had an orange for a head."

I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

Last night I saw an elephant in my pajamas. I don't know why I went to the zoo in my pajamas.

What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

what's long, skin colored, erect, and limp? a finger.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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