What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +42

You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A bar walks into your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Patrick is gay

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Do you know that car over there? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's the difference between a Jew and a black person? Black people are good at running.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

thumb_up thumb_down +34

*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the black say when an asian knocked him out? Nothing, he was knocked out

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops