How do you make a kids fall off a swing? Throw an axe at them

why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

whats the difference between a battery and a charger

9/11/01 walks into a bar

So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

Why did the dog go in the bar? Because the door was left open

A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guiar who? Violin.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

cory is gay

What is the diffrence between a strait guy and a gay guy? The strait guy gets into heaven.

I walked in on my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

A black man and a black woman are in a car, who's driving? The police.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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