What do you call two guys hanging by your window? Kurt and Rod

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Small titties.

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Why did little Johnny eat his homework? Because his family is very poor and he rarely eats.

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Timmy heard that Red Bull gives you wings. He drank one and waited. No wings. He drank another and waited. No wings. Timmy drank 3 cases of Red Bull trying to get wings. Timmy died. The end.

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was disowned by his family due to his drug addiction and had nowhere else to go.

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-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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Q. If you have $5, and a friend has $5, then how much money do you both have? A. You both have $5.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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What time did the tennis start? Tennish

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What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

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what is brown and sticky? a stick

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"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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I love Ciara!

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

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Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

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What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops