Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

69

yo momma is so tall shes tall

A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

How any blondes dose it take to screw in a lightbulb? 3 one to hold the light bulb and two to rotate the ladder

why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

I love Ciara!

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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