Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber.

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How many ears does Chuck Norris have? Two.

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How did Hitler die? He saw his gas bill

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one day tiarnan got banged by a goat

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Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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Windows Vista

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What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

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8=D

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

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How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They gave here a timeout, like any other sensible parent would.

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Why did the man drop his wallet? Because his palms were sweaty from a long, happy day at the beach with his family after moving into there new home.

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

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what do an black ,am and a bicycle have in comman there both objects

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm horny and your bodily figure is very attractive Get naked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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