Why did the man say how was your day? because it was the end of the day

A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go fishing.

Knock Knock Bark, Bark, Bark, Bark, YELP! Whimper Whimper... Hey man, come on in.

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

Obama-Care

What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

Obama is a black man living in a white house. TEEHEE

If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

This is a funny anti-joke. But you probably don't get it.

Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

Your Mama's so fat she need some serious medication treating overweight.

How many Aodhan's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Aodhan's da has already screwed all the lightbulbs...

When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

if u have a problem with this then comment !!!!!!!!!!!

What did the homeless guy do when he saw a bucket? He peed in it

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender asks "What'd you want?" the duck responds "A miller lite please" promptly after that the bartender was tested for mental insanity because he thinks ducks can talk.

This one time, at band camp we played in a band

Why Sam Vitale gay? Because he loves men!

What do u call a gay guy with a long dik Dickgimme a lick

How do you stop a plane? Throw flying birds at it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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