Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

thumb_up thumb_down +32

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Whats worse than HIV? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Banana(s)

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

josh roberts you speccy cuunt

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the boy have no friends ? Because he lived in a small cottage miles away from any civilization with his overly strict parents who would not let him see the daylight and deprived him of any kind of childhood, he has no social skills and does not know how to interact with other human beings at no fault of his own. he is also dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why is the boy severely mentally scarred? He got raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops