Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

Jake Bowar

cot!

A man walks into a car dealership. The salesman was nice and he bought a Mercedes.

What does D.N.A. stand for? Deoxyribonucleic Acid

Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

NEVER

Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

Why did the man walk into a bar? I don't know? Ask him. by Burflared

Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

what did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? cancer.

What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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