Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Why was johny late to school? He died

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really desperate to get laid guy gives out phone number in random places 5802352343 :D

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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What is brown and sticky?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their newborn child.

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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Homosexual babies? It's a choice

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

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A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

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The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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