why is the grass green? all the other colors in the electromagnetic spectrurm are absorbed except for green which is reflected and thats the only visable color

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How did the chicken cross the road? He went to the crosswalk so all the cars had to stop for him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Bobby walked into a bar. He was then escorted out of the bar and arrested because he was underage.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why should you rape a dog instead of a human. Because there esier to catch

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is one of the symtoms of clinical depression? Sadness.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call a room full of one terrorist and several babies? dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

thumb_up thumb_down +4

i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the man die? He jumped of a bridge and then got run over by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why do you walk to your bed at night? Beds cant walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops