Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

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Penis.

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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Q: A black person and a white person decided to have a race, who won? A: The black person, as he exercised and worked out on a regular basis, making him very fast.

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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Wanna hear a joke the WNBA

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Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

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A blond walked into a bar. A guy picked her up and then they had sex.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

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Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

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why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

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What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops