"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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jewish people like other jewish people.

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

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Someone once told me a joke. It was funny.

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What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

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Your mother is so obese that the extra weight is putting strain on her knees she now needs knee surgery.

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Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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Why did the black guy jump into the pool? Because he wanted to go swimming

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What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

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How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

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What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

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Why did Little Jimmy never make it in the NBA? Because he died at age 6.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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what a tomato would say if his friend would be hit by a car? Nothing because tomatoes can't speak

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A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

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My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops