What's black, white, and red all over? A white man's bleeding cancerous tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How did Hitler die? He saw his gas bill

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? over 100

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock! Who's there? Boo. Oh hey man, you got the meth?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mamma so fat that she was chosen to be a contestant on the Biggest Loser and we are all so proud of the amount of weight she has lost.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hey

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Did you know that there is no A is "sodimizing"?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is red and not there? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops