What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

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If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

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A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

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I just found out that you can dislike or like something by clicking the thumbs up or down

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TRUE COMEDY: "HOW ABOUT THAT AIRLINE FOOD!"

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roses are red violets are blue last time I saw u were in a zoo don't worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at u

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Why didn't the black man finish high school? He overdosed on heroin.

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What's better than Justin Bieber's new hit single, "Baby"? Everything

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Akshaytiger World

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killing a baby and putting it in one bucket is one thing... but killing a baby and putting it in ten buckets is just insensitive

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whyo black peopple lie koolade the like the taste

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

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Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

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Why are there no Mexican people on Star Trek? Because the casting director screened thousands of actors and actresses and assembled what he/she felt was the most talented cast to create and sustain a long running television series. Unfortunately no one of Mexican dissent was awarded a role.

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What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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Then what's your favorite team little white guy?

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? genocide whats worse than genocide? getting raped by a giant scorpion

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What's worse than a baby in a car accident? The baby survives and has a mental problem, grows up, and then drives the same car and gets in another accident.

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why was the cow laying down? because little johnny shot him with a 50 calliber

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Anal cheese curds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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