Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

What is the same about a girrafe, and an ant? They are both REALLY tall. Except for the ant, sorry I lied.

Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

Why did Tommy cry? His tear glands emptied out of his eyes

What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

How many drunk Irishmen did it take to change the lightbulb? None, the bulb was fine.

Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

Roses are red, Violets are blue.

An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

why was six afraid of seven? cause seven raped and pillaged eight's family.

Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

Why didn't the black man pay for his child support bills? He made some unwise financial decisions in the past and is working three part time jobs just to stay afloat.

Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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