Last night I saw an elephant in my pajamas. I don't know why I went to the zoo in my pajamas.

Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

What do you call a black person that went to medical school? A doctor

How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

there's two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. one nun says:ooo iv'e never been this way before! the other nun says:i'm not surprised there's roadworks and a diversion!

What's white and sticky? Glue

what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

a show horse jumps over a bar

Two gay men enjoy a wonderful second date together.

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

cot!

When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

Hi! This is Richard Young, I'll take it from here Ms.Mcgruder, lets find a quiet place to talk about this, e.c. at 5:00 p.m. tomarrow.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which evidently do not understand the dangers of crossing a busy road.

What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern pornography collections.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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