Your mum is dead

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

What's one thing a black man can't have? White skin

How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

A Mormon walks into a bar.

what does a nazi and the witch from hansel and gretal have in common, they both put people in ovens.

What di the wrecking ball say to the house? Duck!!!

What do you call a bus full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy

roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

Why would you throw a hooker in a lake? To go fishing

yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

Knock knock! Who's there? Boo. Oh hey man, you got the meth?

i like my women how i like my coffee ....i dont like coffee

Knock-Knock "Who's there?" "It's the police. We have a search warrant."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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