why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

I like the Tsarnaev brothers. They ran the Boston marathon and had a BLAST!

What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

your momma so ugly even she wouldnt date herself.

minorities.

GAY PEOPLE

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

the chicken whent boomand then died

Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

Q. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT GEORGE BUSH? A. NOTHING

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...