What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

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Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

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Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

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what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

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why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

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cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

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What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

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Why did the man drop his glasses? His hand was sweaty.

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Why couldn't the boy ride his bike? He had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? He was hit by a truck.

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me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

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Last night I saw an elephant in my pajamas. I don't know why I went to the zoo in my pajamas.

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

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Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

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When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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