What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

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What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

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knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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If you are going down the road in your boat and the pedal falls off how many cheese burgers can you eat 21 because a motorcycle doesnt have doors.

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

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why couldnt helen keller drive? because shes a woman.

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Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? During the crossover episode of Blossom and Star Trek: Voyager. Six traveled ahead to the distant future and found herself on the aforementioned starship. Her situation was confusing and frightening, even more so when the half-female, half-Borg appeared before her.

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wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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What do you call a file named pedo? A. Pedobear B. Toast C. Pedofile

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R2-D2 is quite possibly the most vulgar character on the set of Star Wars. Every word he says is bleeped out.

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Q. what did the refuge from uganda say to his mom when he was riding his bike A. look ma no hands.....

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What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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