How do you know if a monster is hiding under your bed or in your closet? Go and look.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

What does a tree do all day? Boredom

A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

whats 2+2? 69 LOL

Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? His family had to sell it in order to put food on the table

What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

A dog walks into a bar and falls on his butt beacause dogs cant walk.

Why couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

A simple math problem. If 10% of men are gay, and 20% of men are chinese what is the probability that a man chosen at random spends his free time and meal time both on his knees?

My mom's dead

Knock knock Who's there? Forever alone Forever alone who? You.

Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

a guy takes viatamins thinking they would help him be healthy he choked and then he died from choking on a jolly rancher

LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

Your momma's of a reasonable figure and weight.

A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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