What do you call a bus full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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oops

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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Don't rape me!

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One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

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What's a thither? My sister with a lisp.

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how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

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whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

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how do you kill a mexican? make him go to the cicus

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

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guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

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Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

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21

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A man farted. Another man walked away.

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Do you wanna build a snowman? Person: do you wanna live * or nah

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Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it, it would break.

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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