Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

9/11/01 walks into a bar

Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

name-Sally-Sue What I am good at in school: readin' annnd...math. What I need to work on in school: spelin

What happended to the family in the hurricane? They died stupid

Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

Q: Why happened to the dead whale? A: It was shot by Asian pochures.

how do you know that harry potter isnt real a ginger has two freinds

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

a

Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

What is a pirate's favourite letter? There is no definitive answer. It depends on the individual pirate, and the environmental and genetic factors that go to make up his or her preference for a particular letter.

2

I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

jack shine has boobs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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