Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

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When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

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GAY PEOPLE

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Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

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SPAMS!!!

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What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

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boobs

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Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

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what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Women

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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Why did the small child fall off a cliff? Because it was stupid

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Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

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What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His motives so far are unknown as he is a chicken, and therefor cannot divulge the information.

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Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

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How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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