Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their newborn child.

knock knock who's there? julian julian who? julian gonzalez

a little girl gets raped

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

why did Louisa go black and never go back? She got hit by a truck

Q. What's brown and people don't care when they step on it? A. Dirt

What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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