How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

What's the difference between people who make dead baby jokes and people who don't make dead baby jokes? I don't avoid eye contact with people who don't make dead baby jokes.

Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

Knock Knock Come In! Who me? Yeah. Ok.

Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

Adam Sandler.

womens rights!

When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

a little girl gets raped

How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

2 gingers went to a pumpkin patch... And nobody ever found them( life lesson, don't take your ginger to a pumpkin patch)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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