whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

What did the man say to his wife before they went to bed? Goodnight.

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

women's rights

How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

Q. How do you kill a fish A. You don't have to BP already did

What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

Knock Knock. Shut up.

Why was the Amish man dead? Because he fell off of his fridge, while trying to screw in a light bulb.

Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

Why is brennan goldade such a loser? Cause he likes men

What lives underground? Grandpa

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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