Hello I'm a fat kid

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Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

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What happen to the boys drink when the girl took a Sharp turn? Nothing the lid was securely fastened.

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Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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who farted? umm........that guy.

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What do you do when you're making out with your girlfriend? Play with another dude's ass.

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You know what they say about big feet... big penis.

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What do you find....... there's a..........

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NEVER

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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What's worse then a dead baby? a dead baby in a blender

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What did the white man say to the black man? We both deserve to be treated as equals although we are from much different cultural backgrounds.

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What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

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What happens when Batman Robin and Wonder woman go on a date? Somebody isn't getting laid.

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How many apples fit in a garbage bag? I actually don't know. I was asking you.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

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Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Monica Lebinsky, your neighhbor"

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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