There once was a rich man who owned a really big mansion, he's a very organised man and likes routine, every day at 6.30pm he goes for an hour long jog. One day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his mansion is on fire and he can see a little orange man running away in the distance. But he thinks nothing of it. The man has lost a lot of money, but can still afford to move into a slighty smaller, yet still very large house. The next day he goes out for his jog and when he gets back his big house is on fire and again, he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it, but has now lost even more money, and has to move into a regular size house. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his house is on fire and again he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it and has lost even more money. He is really gutted by this point and now has to move into a single bedroom flat. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his flat is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He still thinks nothing of it and has now lost all his money, and has to move into a cardboard box under a bridge. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his cardboard box is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He is sick of this and decides to chase the little orange man. When he catches him he tackles him to the ground, turns him over and asks.. did you burn down my mansion, my big house, my average sized house, my flat, and my box? The little orange man replies no.

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Women Drivers.

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What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

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Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

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How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

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What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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How can you tell that a blonde has been using a computer? You can't. There's no common link between computing habits and hair color.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

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the joke below me is not an anti joke

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

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Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

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a boy walks in a house and mother says hi who are you and the boy says does it really matter whad really maters is wht you will do about your dead son

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

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Black people are clen.

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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a little girl gets raped

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What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winning it twice.

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A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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