Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

why did stacey marry bally because she loves him

What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

two fish are in a tank.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch? Names

penisface

Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

Knock-knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. I'm calling the police.

A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

okay.....

How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

Why did the Asian man have squinty eyes? He was looking at the sun.

What do you say to a blind buss driver? You suck

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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