What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

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Knock Knock. Shut up.

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I've got the moobs like jagger.

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How many drunk Irishmen did it take to change the lightbulb? None, the bulb was fine.

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Simon Cowell's hair is real.

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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9:11 make a wish

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whats better than shoes feet

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Q. What's brown and people don't care when they step on it? A. Dirt

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's just been shot, despite the fact that zebra hunting is illegal.

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

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Someone once told me a joke. It was funny.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

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A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

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How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

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A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

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Mmmmmmm Lemons

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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