whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Noah is Smart.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

That's what he said.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

thumb_up thumb_down +29

there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Pianca going ham

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the black kid get for Christmas? A Derrick Rose jersey.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops