Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

Your mum is dead

Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

Women's Rights

What do you get a black guy when he is hungry? Something edible.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

I don't get it

Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

Why did the man die? He jumped of a bridge and then got run over by a train.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? - - - A: Nothing. If it is red all over, then it is not black and white.

How do you kill a fox in Canada? Cut it's leg off and let it run!

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Tweet.

Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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