What is worse then Hitler? Shelly's Cooking.

What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

One night you tell your mom to make you a sandwich, the next day in school you ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch

Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

What lives underground? Grandpa

What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

lol

Avery has crabs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

A man is talking to his friend at work. The man asks his friend, "Did you see the game last night?" Then a plane crashes into the building and we call it 911

Black people

Whats the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

What do you call a black man who flies planes? A pilot, what do you call him you freaking racist!?!?!?!?!?

Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

What do you call a gay, black, Muslim physician? Doctor.

Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

Once upon a time, You have a nice rack...

Covietz has a large penis

Time flies like a banana.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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