Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

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Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. It's funny because the robot has no arms.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? - - - A: Nothing. If it is red all over, then it is not black and white.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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If you look up stupid in the dictionary the definition would say stu·pid? ?[stoo-pid, styoo?] -er, -est, noun adjective 1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. 2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question. 3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party. 4. annoying or irritating; troublesome: Turn off that stupid radio. 5. in a state of stupor; stupefied: stupid from fatigue.

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Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

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what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

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Why did Willy kill the black man? Because not.

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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How do you make an antijoke corny. How? Corn.

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Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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The glass is half an hour.

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Your mom is such a slut that she has herpes.

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Lets make like trees and stand still

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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