Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

What is the difference between a man and a woman? Genitals

Whoa! A talking carrot!

What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

A: Want to hear a funny joke? B: Nah, I'm okay

What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Once upon a time, You have a nice rack...

A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

Jewish People

#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

Penis jokes.

roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

WNBA

Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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