Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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Penis jokes.

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A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

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WNBA

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N e one else find the girl in the cellar from the new evil dead creepy ? Like shes some real demon being used by the movie industry to scare people? (serious qestion)

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What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

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A horse walks into a bar...n

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baby seal walks into a bar

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What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

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Why did Willy kill the black man? Because not.

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Roses are red Voliets are blue I suck at making poems Refrigerator

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

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What the diffrence between a jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven

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This joke isnt funny.

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Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

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What did the man do when he went to the toilet went toilet

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

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What is white on the top and black on the bottom? Society

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

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knock knock come in

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What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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