Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

A priest, a rabbi, and an atheist walk into a bar. They sit down and have a calm discussion about the differences in their beliefs.

Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

Why did video kill the radio star? He slept with videos wife.

What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

your mother's head is so big that she wears very big hats.

Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

why did the chicken cross the road Kill yoself

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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