What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

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The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

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women's lacrosse.

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Pickle!

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

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What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

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What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? Most people are ignorant of the global sex slave trafficking industry and apathetic about global hunger.

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Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Who wears a forest ranger's hat and carries a can of kerosene? An arsonist who happens to be a forest ranger.

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Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

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What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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Knock knock It's open, come in.

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knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

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Slavery

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A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops