a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster? One dead baby in 10 dumpsters.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

Wanna hear a joke the WNBA

What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised how far a can can preach in Chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he entered with a swine, and the muslim is embarrased for the horse.

Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...