Knock Knock Who's there? Somebody who wants to come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

noodles

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you throw a drowning guitarist? An emergency floatation device.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? cause' he was annoyed with all the stereotypcial idiots who insist he crosses the road for comical value

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides to go to to Lowe's instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

who farted? umm........that guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

lol

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what do you call a needle with two heads? a two headed needle

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your doorbell is broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: Why do Jews have big noses? A: Because air is free!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Roses are Red, violets are blue, I have STD, Now so do you. :3

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops