When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

Whats long and hard? a pole

What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

roses are blue violets are red I am dyslexic and possibly a Jew EJ

Why did the angry husband murder his cheating wife? She forgot to cook dinner.

A Black man walks out of a KFC.

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

I'm gay. Great me too.

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picked her up and then they had sex.

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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this website...

The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

fart

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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