Why did an abusive childhood affect the little boy's behavior? Beats me.

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What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

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666 im christian

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

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Hello

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How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

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Why did the old man step on the caterpillar? For fun.

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Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Why did johnny fall down? He got hit in the head with a brick

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What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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What is 6 plus 9? 15

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

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What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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