Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

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Two girls were sitting quietly. Badum tss

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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NEIL PERT IS THE GREATEST DRUMMER OF ALL TIME!! I LOIVE SMOSH VIDEOS I SEENT EVERY ONE LOLOL

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What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

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Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

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Why did the angry husband murder his cheating wife? She forgot to cook dinner.

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What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

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There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

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What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

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What did the man say to his wife? Go make me a sandwich!

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whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

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Golf.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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