I came.

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

name-Sally-Sue What I am good at in school: readin' annnd...math. What I need to work on in school: spelin

a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

Why did the bunny eat his food

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

American Idol

Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

Knock, Knock Who's there? The KKK

you are so ugly you continuously get made fun of for it everyday and already have a savings account for plastic surgery in the near future.

Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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