roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

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My dad beats my mom At checkers

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

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jordan HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH

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In Soviet Russia, everyone leads a perfectly normal life.

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What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

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If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

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Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

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when does the phrase "time heals all wounds" not apply? to people with fatal wounds.

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What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

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Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Write your own

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Women's rights.

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option 1, minecraft VS option 2, friends

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Why is jim gay? because he likes men

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*Look Down* Nice shoes, wanna F@#k?

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Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

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Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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