What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

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Your mom is so dumb that she failed to pass her 11th grade year, forcing her to drop out to get a GED and spend the rest of her life at a dead end job

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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That's what he said.

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A blond walked into a bar. A guy picked her up and then they had sex.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

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Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

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your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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Pickle!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

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what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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women's lacrosse.

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What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

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What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? Most people are ignorant of the global sex slave trafficking industry and apathetic about global hunger.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops