A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

Sea World Japan.

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why is brennan goldade such a loser? Cause he likes men

a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

W.N.B.A.

I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

How do you leave a man in suspense...

what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

What did the pickle say to the banana? Nothing both of thiese particular things are sentiment and incapable of producing words and or thoughts. Along with a diverse enough personality to be creative enough to even think about asking a question. If you thought otherwise,GO SEE A DOCTER. Having sentiment objects talk to you is not normal.

I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

What is the difference between a bench and a black man? It is socially acceptable to sit on a bench to eat your lunch. If you did so to a black man you would probably be arrested.

A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

how do you make a blonde laugh on friday tell her shes a blonde on monday

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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